Tuesday, July 6, 2010

a fruitless harvest

I haven't been able to blog in a very long time it seems. But, figure that for today I will go a differnt route, just discuss some things that are on my mind. Today's readings in Hosea seem to magnify what has been on my heart lately.
" the stalk of grain that forms no ear can yield no flower.".........When Ephraim made many altars to expiate sin, his altars became occasions of sin.
The reason why I find it so difficult to write anything is that I feel like I am being torn in two. I find myself bouncing between 2 totally different Catholic Churches. I can find NO peace doing this. In my heart and in my prayers I hear the importants of reverance, in reparation. As much as I love my home Parish, I feel in faith that I have been shown that so many things are lacking or maybe exchanged for something new and modern. I see and feel the faith that is shared by us regular morning mass goers, but also feel so much is being lost. I desire so completely for our church to be restored. I want so badly for the tabernacle to return to the center of our church. In our parish the tabernacle is over to the side. A good percentage of seats in our church have an obstructed view. People come in genuflect to the St Domiano Icon and walk right past the tabernacle. Do they understand that HE is there? I don't feel it. Maybe that is why people are leaving the church, or comming to church but ignoring his commandments . I want to run! I am so tired of feeling that our Catholic faith has been replaced right in front of our eyes. I want to walk into my church and know that was is taught is good and true and pure teachings from Jesus himself. Does anyone else feel a little scared when they hear the readings? How can He be happy with a mass that focuses on the parish priest who sits high in a preciding chair in the exact spot that the tabernacle should be. I guess I may be babbling now, but this is partly why I don't write any more. I am at a loss for words. Pray for me will you please!